Pleasure is about having freedom. However, freedom is the right to be yourself, full of worth and love. You are linked to everyone else alive on this planet.
Women have always been denied pleasure. They’ve been conditioned to believe that pleasure isn’t a priority because their job is to care for others and prioritize the pleasure of others over their own. Women have been taught that seeking pleasure for oneself is selfish or greedy.
Pleasure is not intended to exist solely for the benefit of others. It’s more than just a means of increasing intimacy with another human being. Our pleasure is free to be had, to be savored as part of self-love practice. Too often, it is assumed that everything women do is solely for the enjoyment and attention of an audience. If women put on makeup, high heels, or a dress, it is at times perceived to be for someone else. If women do something different, it must be for a reason other than their own pleasure. When women sign up for some dancing classes, it is assumed that the sole purpose would be to attract or impress a partner.
While self-pleasure may not be the only key to self-empowerment, what could be more powerful than focusing on our own pleasure, exploring our own bodies, and developing a deeper understanding of what we like and dislike? While it may or may not include a partner, it’s simply pleasuring for the sake of pleasure. I’m not suggesting that a sex toy can completely replace a partner, but it could go a long way toward making lonely nights a little less lonely.
Of course, reclaiming pleasure entails more than just purchasing the ideal orgasm-inducing toy. It also entails engaging our sensuality. We can concentrate on bare skin on cool sheets, the decadent scent of a candle, the luxurious slide of our favorite body oil or lotion against our skin, and the sensation of our own skin touching skin eliciting pleasure. It’s like running the petals of a flower or a feather across sensitive skin or running an ice cube down a hot body on a hot day. We can enjoy dancing in our bedrooms and the taste of wine on our tongues.
Our pleasure is not meant to exist solely for the sake of others’ enjoyment. It’s more than just a means of increasing intimacy with another human being. Our pleasure is free to be had, to be savored as part of our self-love practice. Reclaiming your pleasure is reclaiming your power.